Look at this fool. Intoxicating my front yard with her cheap perfume. A mere good afternoon is more than her. She only knows how to chew bubblegum and wind her waist. Why must she empty fifteen cans of this nonsense perfume on her body before going out? Or has nobody told her the spray will not lift her breasts which are now almost touching her sandals? I don’t even want her good afternoon. Before you know it, it is me she will be asking if I know anyone who does quick and instant termination. No me oh! I will not be a perpetrator.

Eh hein now! Young girl, fallen breasts, stretch marks, no children to show for it. Do you have a better explanation? 

‘Ma Adeh I salot oh,’.

‘Eh.’ A victim of circumstance.

The latest convert in town. We have all seen her mother. Her visits from the village had become more frequent. The crying. The shouting. The casting. The binding. The rebuking.

We did not need a soothsayer to know that her mother had started worrying about her non-forthcoming Grandmother status. Was it ever going to happen? Why was the cry of irritable children not filling Nchong’s house like it was other houses. 

Nchong held her Good News Bible against her chest and hurried down the road. I am tired of shaking my head at this façade they are putting on. Did she or did she not know? I know for a fact that her husband fathers at least two of the children I’ve seen attending Sunday School. Who’s arguing? That circular nose with the distinctive bulbous beak could only have originated from one seed. But like a sensible woman, I always mind my business. I will not be the one to tell. Let her god reveal it to her. I refuse to help rumours spread.

Ah, ah! Who is this emptying dust on my veranda this afternoon? Where are my glasses? Is that Ngwanah? Small Ngwanah, because he has been to America one or two times and now drives a 3rd hand Carina thinks he can now fly past my house and wash me with dust? Why don’t you personalize the plate at least so we can recognize which one of these debilitated noisy engines that wake people up on this road is yours? People who drive real cars don’t even need to announce themselves. When my son visits, nobody hears.That car of his is so smooth-running and faultless. I’ve even told him that one day he will drive into my room and park by my bed and I will not hear. 

Fosa, Fosa. The way she flings her human hair and those her spindly legs in this wind. How will all the local champions not want her? If it is the Fanta complexion they are after they are fooling themselves. Who does not know her supplier in this town? I have seen family albums. Old pictures. Dating back to her grandfathers, great grandfathers and fore fathers. Not a single one of them is fair-skinned. All of them as dark as pawpaw seeds like myself here. 

What is that smell? Aggie hasn’t learnt to cook yet? I’ve heard people say her kitchen is like a Chemistry lab. She’s always experimenting. Where she learnt to put tomatoes in eru, I’m still to find out. Or crayfish in stew. The way her husband scavenges for food at parties is painful to watch.

Girls who don’t know how to keep their man baffle me. My man knows me. My perky breasts and flouncy bottom are exactly the same as when he met me. All these small small girls cannot try me. Before they say yin, I’ve said yin-yang and then yin again. They want to know how I do it.

Who will tell them?

Who will tell them that once you’ve made a man beg for you, there’s nothing any other woman can make him do.

*************************************************************

Felt like writing today…and I did! Wrote it this afternoon on my lunch break. 

Hope you love.

Love & Light 

Lydie xx

 

It’s a few days late but I just had to post these pics from  the Actors Guild of Nigeria President Ibinabo Fiberesima’s star studded birthday party. The actress turned actors’ advocate invited friends and colleagues to the Chesney Hotel in Victoria Island, Lagos and everyone honoured the invite. Rita Dominic, Chidi Mokeme, Uche Jombo, Desmond Elliot, 2Face Idibia, Ramsey Nouah, Omotola Jalade-Ekeinde, Monalisa Chinda, Stephanie Linus, Mike Ezuruonye and many others were there to celebrate with Ibinabo.

I am in love with the prints some of these ladies are wearing. Everyone’s glowing. Wow. Even the cake is in print. Totesamaze! Get a peak at the massive fun they had below. 

Courtesy of Eternal Pictures.

Birthday girl
Birthday girl

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Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija001 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija003 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija004 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija005 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija006 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija010 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija013 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija016-600x400 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija017 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija019 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija020 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija021 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija022 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija023 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija026 Ibinabo-Fiberesima-AGN-Birthday-Party-January-2013-BellaNaija027

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Hiya fashion lovers, been putting off my blog posts for a while now. Way too many things going on. It’s been a busy few last weeks and I feel exhausted. Check my Instagram for more regular updates when I’m too lay to post:((  @msaidyl1.  But I’ve been so wanting to put up this OOTD that I just can’t wait any longer. Coloured suits have been trending like crazy lately. I love bright colours especially yellow so my look is inspired by Solange Knowles and Leigh Lezark who all effortlessly rocked the yellow suit.

*One thing you have to remember when going shopping for a coloured suit is you absolutely should not expect to find a pre-matched pair sitting in the shop and waiting for you. be more open-minded. Buy separates and match them. This option is usually cheaper as it turns out and the chances that you’ll see someone rocking your exact same suit is very low.  For this OOTD, both my blazer and trousers come from different stores but when paired, they seemed made for each other.

It baffles me how I fell in love with the colour yellow. I think it’s as inexplicable as the mystery behind why I have been watching endless videos of the totally amazing (totesamaze) P’Trique on YouTube. I guess because they keep me laughing. I wish I was as chic, lol.

Now back to why I’m in love with yellow. Maybe because it has been a predominant colour for the most part of my life.

Yellow is colour of the taxis that parade of streets of Cameroon huffing and coughing and occasionally stopping in need for a push or two from its passengers. 

Yellow (more like golden tone though)  is the first colour I dyed my hair despite the snide remarks you could hear from my parents each time they spotted someone with outrageous hair. “So you have now replaced Sisqo,” was the first comment my Dad greeted me with when he first saw the results. To be honest in retrospect my hair was so loud I looked like a scared mongoose. But I loved and lived every minute of the craziness.

Yellow is the colour of  all my favourite drinks. Orange juice, pineapple, tango, and fizzy drinks. Wine with a touch of sparkle here and there.

Yellow is also the colour of the sun. And I am such a summery person. I was born in May. And May is gay (as in happy). Am all about good spring flowers and sunshine. Golden sunshine. Gold shines yellow. Who doesn’t love gold? 

Yellow is also the colour of teeth. My Grandpa’s teeth. Smiling back at me from the last and most recent photo (September 2010) I have of him. He’s passed on since a few months ago but his memory definitely remains. I’ll miss that smile.

These and more are all the things that inspire me to wear yellow. What is the colour of your life? how does it inspire you to shine through it?

Outfit:

Blazer-H&M

Palazzo trousers-Mango

White Vest-Marks & Spencer

Heels-Dune

Bag-Ebay

Necklace-Superdrug

 

 

 

These are the looks that inspired my ‘Colour Me Yellow’ look.

Leigh Lezark
Solange Knowles

Did you love them? Rate, subscribe, comment and share!

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Think sharp, stay sharp!
 

 

One thing I love about blogging is the fact that you get to encounter and interact with some of the most creative people. There are more innovative people out there than we can ever imagine. One of them is the creative brain and magic hands behind Umba. Umba is an African textile jewelry and accessory line using only high quality african wax and ankara wax fabrics which I stumbled upon on Facebook. The handcrafted designs are unique, the fabric is out of this world, every piece is a stand out. There was no way I could resist doing a blog post on it.

 

About the brand.

Umba ~ Origin Swahili (V) to create, make, or mold. 
Umba is an African textile jewelry line that only uses high quality African Ankara wax fabric. Ankara African fabrics are expressed culturally through rich vibrant patterns and colorful designs. n the creator’s own words, “the world we live in often dictates what we should wear, we respond by crafting timeless pieces that evolve every generation. Umba ensures that each piece created is created using time, patience, and positive energy. Every piece of jewelry from Umba is handcrafted and custom made, NO two pieces are ever identical. Life is full of duplications; why not complement yourself with something unique and original? At Umba we embrace, individuality, comfort, and fun. Become your own trendsetter…..Dream. Embrace.Explore. Dare. “

The Brain behind the Brand.

Owner and designer Chelsie “Chloe” Hart, established Umba in the summer of 2012. Umba is a manifestation of visions, dreams, and inspirations. Early on, Chelsie took a deep interest in African culture and fashion. While attending VCU, her interest was sparked by being emerged in an extreme multicultural environment. On Chelsie’s 25th birthday, she recalls a vivid vision of an accessory line featuring a core of African fabric in every original piece. And from this vision, Umba slowly began to take form and is now blooming into a full jewelry/accessory line and much more. The basis of Umba is modernized African culture, tradition, and fashion. Chelsie is currently bringing this inspiring vision to life in her hometown, which is located in the beautiful state of Virginia.

For more information please contact her here:

Chelsie “Chloe” Hart
Umba Owner/ Designer
Twitter: LoveUmba
Instagram: NubianBombshell
Phone Contact:(336)473-8513
Alt Email: Hartcm08@gmail.com
The Best part.
I urge you to take a good look at these designs because they are all on special offer specifically for Art Becomes You readers. How cool s that ! Umba is offering 15% off marked prices when you purchase any of these beautiful pieces on their website. Visit the Art Becomes You Facebook page and click ‘Like’ to view the code. (Click here to visit page.)

Those necklaces are giving me life! Visit http://umba.storenvy.com/  to purchase these pieces. Remember to quote visit http://www.facebook.com/pages/Art-Becomes-You/241049802595919  for 15% discount code to shop at Umba!

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Think sharp, stay sharp!
 

Having a slow start? Don’t fret. Our style diary is here to provide you with the most diverse and interesting styles around the blogosphere. Today’s diary is Valerie whose sewing and creative skills I envy greatly.
Hey people, My name is Seyi and I am from Nigeria. I am a Fashion designer and I just finished from FIDM. I am a very laid back person, I love fashion, I also love reading, I guess i’m kind of a nerd. 
– My dressing is eclectic, I don’t follow trends. I get my inspiration from everywhere, vintage, African fashion, movies, blogs. 
– I love Zara, Asos, H&M and Forever 21. If I like it, I buy it, so far it is within my budget. 
– I just try to wash my face at night, apart from that, I don’t do anything special. 

– Ok! I don’t know Jack about make up, My makeup bag is so scanty it is embarrassing, I just love lipsticks, I don’t have eye shadows, mascaras and all of that. 
– I like my lips, I guess that’s why I love lipsticks.I have so many. 
-Fave track is Chris Brown’s All back. 
– I like so many trends now, its surprising. I like the mixing prints trend, the neon trend, the bib necklace trend, the oversize clutch trend, the hi-low trend and so many others. 
– I think things should be done in moderation and also should be occasion appropriate, don’t go for a formal event looking like you are going to the club. 
-5 must haves: I cannot do without a lip gloss in my purse, if i forget it at home, I stop by somewhere to get one, A pair of flats, I love comfort so even if i wear heels, I always carry back up flats, A big bag, that can fit all my stuff, that is why i love the oversize clutch trend, my phone and a pair of sunnies
– All time icon is Coco Chanel 
– Best quote : when you dress Shabbily, people remember the dress, when you dress fabulous, people remember the woman – Coco Chanel 
– My blog- blackvalerie.blogspot.com/ 
lookbook- lookbook.nu/user/238432-Valerie-B 
My facebook fan page: facebook.com/Blackvalerie 
I love the African print girl. What do you make of  Valerie’s style?
Rate, comment, subscribe and share:)
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Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Art-Becomes-You/241049802595919
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